Theory for being happy

When growing up, kids are frequently asked by their aunt or grandpa, “So what are you going to do when you finish school?” insinuating that they have a plan, even that they’re going to finish school. If a kid is so lucky to be aware of exactly what they want to do, it’s a simple question. “I’m going to become a doctor,” “I’m going to fly for Alaska Airlines,” “I’m going to become a receptionist for a paper company.” However for those who don’t know what they want to be by their 15th birthday, it can become a nagging question.

In my daily life I find myself thinking about what I’m doing. Really, I don’t know for sure. Each second another precious moment passes, and part of me with it, which does sound like a cliche, but it’s true. I’ve gone through almost a full year of high school, and it feels like I just started 5th grade. I can see into the most likely future; me at a college which I wasn’t sure was right for me but I’m going along with it because I’m gonna try to make it work, just like my confusing relationship at the time.

10 years forward: I have 3 kids, my chances of becoming an astronaut are slim because I put my family first. 10 more years ahead: my kids start facing puberty, they come to me (I hope) with all their hormonal problems, “Does Jason really like me?” “Why do I have to do the laundry?” “How do I know what I want to do for my career?” And so starts the circle again. Now I’m in charge and have to use all my authoritative parental knowledge to tell my kids exactly what they want to do, because of course I know what’s best for them.

10 more years: my kids are leaving. Currently, I can’t imagine what heartbreak moms go through when the little birds leave the nest, but now I’m experiencing it. It’s a good thing; it means the circle is continuing. They’re going to create their own lives, their own families, and ultimately mine, and they’ll drift apart from their mom. I’m freaking out right now just thinking about it.

10 years more: My kids have their own kids. I have gray hair. Mom and Dad are gone. I’m not in 5th grade anymore but sometimes it still feels like it. My grandkids are different from what my siblings and I were like at their age. They fight over hoverboards, they have a fit because they didn’t get the new Apple 9+. They don’t want to hear about grandma’s adventures with super glue as a kid when she glued her hands together, or how she used to chat with friends just through pictures with text, what are those called? Memes? My generation is over. I’ll soon be over with it.

10 years forward: My husband is gone. My grandkids are more out of control, they’re starting the puberty stage. Realization hits me: I could have prevented this. I didn’t know what I was doing when I went into 5th grade, or started college, or when I got married, or when I decided to put family instead of career. Why did my life go downhill as my age inclined? When was I last happy? As I sip my peppermint tea and pet one of my several cats, I think back to when I first started high school. I was new to public school, I didn’t know more than 3 people in a 400 people crowd. Gradually I made many friends, got good grades, and figured my life would work itself out. Just live in the moment, I’d tell myself. I don’t need to worry about my career yet, I’m barely 15. The best I can do is get good grades to set myself up for later. But even if I had all As, would I put my career as a part-time successful aerospace engineer and part-time astronaut for Blue Origin over my career as a mom? I recall what my Mom said to me, so many years before the peppermint tea and cats, being a mom is the most important job in the world. Did I make the right choice? Did I raise my kids in the best way? Was I ready? I’ll have no way to know, and no way to change it, but it will be the foremost question on my mind.

10 years forward: My grandkids are starting college, and start asking me questions about my life. Finally! I can tell about my 4.0 I had first semester of freshman year, my pride in all those As, then they say, “So if you had top marks, why would you have a family instead of becoming an astronaut?” I have no answer. My kids start their own gray hairs and ask me, “How did it feel when we left you? What did you do? What do I do?” Again, I’m the authoritative parental figure. I felt the same way you do! What did I do? I moved on with my life and moved to a smaller house, got a few cats, enjoyed the fruits of my labors. What do you do? You are the responsible adults I raised, I taught how to use logic to your advantage, I clothed and fed you and gave up a career as an astronaut for your benefit. You should know what to do, just as much as I did when I was your age. It could come off as complaining, but I mean it to get the point across, and to justify within myself that I made the right choice, which is all I can do.

10 years more: I’ve passed away. My last wish, if I had not gotten to space by then, was to be cremated and have part of my ashes sent to space in a capsule, and some spread to family members, who are all deeply saddened by my death. Nothing left.

So what now? I’m not dead, I don’t have kids, or grandkids for that matter, I haven’t finished high school, but I’ve finished 5th grade. 5. The number 5 is expressed by humans by holding up one hand, extending all 5 fingers (or really, 4 fingers and one thumb). From an outsider’s view, what we do with said hands with outstretched fingers is plain weird. We slap them together, called high-fiving. This is meant to express happiness, jubilation, sometimes pride, but the root is happiness. At the end of the above story, did I achieve my maximum happiness? I doubt it. There’s always a way to be happier. Even smiling everyday will make your life better. There’s so much I need to do, but doing all of those things will bring to light what I enjoy doing. It could be doing an engineer’s job, it could be going to space, it could be being a mom. I don’t know what I want to do, except I know that whatever happens I want to be happy. Don’t overthink things, pursue what you love, and just live in the moment.

The New Me

Hi everyone!

It’s been a while since My First Blog Post, and I have changed. A business isn’t really my profession anymore (even though I love cooking!). In 2013, my brother started his freshman year at a school focused on STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math). I was not surprised when he got in (you had to enter with an application, and not many people got accepted), for he is quite smart and talented. I knew that I did not at all want to go to that school, so I started thinking about what I wanted to do when I grew up. I immediately thought of owning a business, for I had opened a website centered around that, and it had been my dream since very young.

However, throughout the next year, my feelings started to change. I sometimes imagined myself going to my brother’s school, and how my life would be different. Would I still want to own a business, or would I seek out another field, such as STEM? As I kept thinking about it, my brother excelled in his learning and capability, and I was thinking more about the latter. As we witnessed him through his sophomore year, I had (reluctantly at first) joined a group that focuses on STEM as well, but mainly women in flight (it is an all girl club). As I kept going to the meetings, something in me changed; something that I had never felt before. It was the flame of passion for aeronautics that started flickering and I unknowingly told myself to listen to it. Throughout this past year I have persevered in many fields of ‘women in aviation’, as well as STEM. That club set me on the path that will make my future the brightest it could be. I have to thank the many girls in the club, many of who have become close friends, the mentors who volunteer their time with us, and our amazing leader.

It has been about 2 years since my brother started in his school, and as I said at the beginning, I do not want to own a business anymore. This year I am applying to the school (Raisbeck Aviation High School) and I will know if I got in once January arises. I really think this is the path for me, because it will open doors that I thought were iron-clad, and it makes me excited to learn, experience, and keep moving forward.

I hope this has helped you in case you were in a choice battle, because I sure was! Thank you for taking your time to read what I have to say.


My first blog entry

My name is Isabelle and I have been interested in making a business ever since I was about 7.

The business I think about is a cafe because I like a place where people can relax, get a coffee or a pastry and chat with friends.

In October of 2013, the Renton Chamber of Commerce gave me the opportunity to talk with business owners and help me get inspired. I was very happy with the outcome and I look forward to more great meetups with business owners.

Not very many people have the opportunity to start at a place with tons of people who know what they’re talking about and are excited to help you. I am very grateful for this opportunity.

Please check out My Essays page. Hopefully it will inspire you.